Finding sanity in my insanity

Okay, so this title is a bit of an overstatement. But here goes. I used my overthinking to my advantage.

That sentence, in itself, is enough achievement for a whole blog, but I'll explain myself. Disclaimer: This whole situation might feel a bit silly and small to a "normal" person, but it felt like a big deal to me.

A few weeks ago, my boyfriend started playing Pokemon Go. Yes, I know we're a year too late to the party, but hey, we're 90's kids. He downloaded the game at the same time our neighbor did, who is also a young man, mid-20's. And they started playing the game together. And I mean PLAYING, as in running out of the house at 10 p.m. because "there's a Snorlax in the Toys R Us parking lot."

Anyway, I felt very left out. Here I was, sitting alone at home while he and his buddy ran around like kids. It felt very petty of me, which is why I started overthinking in the first place. Here's a bit of how my stream of thoughts went:
Why do I feel this bad? It's just a stupid game.
But he plays all the time. Is it because he doesn't want to be around me?
No, that's stupid. You're a person. He just finds the game fun and interesting.
So if it's not me, why is he leaving all the time?
Well, he does like to hang out with our neighbor. They're good friends.
But I'm his friend too. Doesn't he want to play with me?
Play the game? Do you need an invitation?

After all that figuring out why I felt bad and being alone, I decided to swallow my pride. Who cared if it was a stupid game? The problem was that I was depressed and alone. The solution was to find a way to stop being depressed and alone. A.K.A to play the game.

And you know what? It worked.

We started hanging out more, going on walks, going out with our neighbors. I could tell when we went out that the young man's wife was feeling the same way I had been: left out, lonely, and frustrated. I just didn't think it was my place to tell her what to do. In some ways, I wish I'd felt comfortable telling her I understood.

As ever, I can't stop myself from giving a little advice. Yes, this was a pretty easily-handled situation. But I could have very easily just sat there and continued to think about it and be lonely and overanalyze why the game was more fun than I was. Instead, and maybe it was by chance, my brain gave me an option I needed. It gave me a solution to the questions circling around my mind. If you often find yourself overthinking about a situation, it can help to try and focus your thoughts in a direction that leads to answers - if you can't turn off the overthinking entirely. This is a form of therapy in itself. Another part of being aware of your own thoughts. You have all these thoughts buzzing through your head. There's bound to be a solution in there somewhere.

Overthinking your way to worse health

Overthinking. It's enough to keep you up at night - literally.

As I've mentioned time and time again, anxiety can do some ugly things to your thoughts. But it's not always the ugly things that can affect someone with anxiety disorder. Simply thinking about too many things, all the time can be a struggle to live with. These thoughts can just be thoughts, not worries or anything that a "normal" person would label as "anxious."

That's the thing about anxiety. People don't always realize that it's not that you're feeling anxious all the time. Sometimes there are just thoughts in your head that spiral out of control. Heck, the overwhelming number of thoughts going through our heads can be enough to make a person anxious. But what we fail to understand is how this overthinking and general anxiety hurt other parts of our health. I've heard others (and probably argued this myself) say that "It's only in my head. It's not hurting the other parts of me." Maybe not directly, but the problems that come along with anxiety can be dangerous to our health.

For one thing, overthinking can make you stressed. Stress and anxiety kind of go hand in hand. But stress can affect our sleep, eating habits, and overall physical health. And when you're not in peak physical condition, you have a much smaller chance of being able to effectively deal with mental illness.

Those who know me could tell you the most common reason I can't sleep is because "my brain woke up." I'm sure other people with anxiety issues can relate. One moment you're in a peaceful, deep slumber. Then the next, you wake up and start thinking. You may not even realize you're thinking. And it may not even be something that makes you anxious. Your brain just turns itself on and thoughts get out of control. It can be frustrating - and there's another element of your health affected by overthinking: emotional health.

It's easy to say people with mental health issues also have problems with emotional health. But it's not that simple. It's not like we don't feel happy or angry or sad or any of the other emotions a "normal" person experiences. The problem is that our emotions can get thrown off easily. Queue the overthinking.

I hate to throw some math out there, but let's try this equation:

Anxiety + overthinking + lack of sleep = unstable emotions

Get it? Even a person without a mental illness has probably experienced this problem. So what's the solution? As with all things mental health related, I'm sorry, but it's not easy. I cannot stress enough the power of guided meditation. The ability to control your thoughts is so valuable. It's really a skill everyone should learn. A hint if you're trying to get back to sleep: I've heard focusing on one thing and trying to get all the details right helps. Like picturing your childhood home. For me personally, I like to replay episodes of TV shows in my mind or recall a recipe I've recently made. It's mostly a matter of getting your mind to focus on one thing.

Do you have any suggestions on how to control overthinking? What works for one doesn't work for all. Only by working together to understand and treat mental illness can we overcome these barriers.